When Everything Changed: Reflections on Writing Sudden Change

There are moments in life when everything shifts—and you’re left standing in the aftermath, wondering who you really are.Writing Sudden Change was my way of answering that question.

This memoir isn’t just a collection of memories. It’s a piece of my soul. It’s the truth I kept quiet for far too long. From my childhood in Cherry Hill to the turning points that reshaped me—grief, love, faith, and coming out—this book is my honest account of what happens when life forces you to grow before you’re ready.

I didn’t write this to be polished. I wrote it to be real.

📖 Why I Wrote Sudden Change

I’ve lived through my fair share of silence—times when I didn’t feel safe enough to speak, to love, or to be fully seen. I’ve had to grieve people who were still alive. I’ve had to let go of versions of myself that I clung to out of fear. And I’ve had to learn how to rebuild my faith, not from a church pew, but from the depths of pain.

I wrote Sudden Change to tell the truth about all of that. About what it means to grow up with trauma. About wrestling with identity. About losing and finding myself—over and over again.

But most of all, I wrote it for anyone who’s ever stood at the edge of transformation and wondered if they could survive it.

✨ What I Learned Along the Way

While writing, I kept asking myself:

• Who was I before the world told me who to be?

• What parts of me deserve to be seen, even if they don’t make others comfortable?

• Can I still believe in something greater after everything I’ve been through?

  
  

The answers weren’t always easy—but they were necessary.

What I’ve come to realize is that change doesn’t just happen to us. It happens for us. Even when it’s painful. Even when it breaks us wide open. There’s always something sacred in the shift.

📚 If You're Reading Sudden Change...

If you’re holding this book in your hands (or heart), I want to offer you more than just a story. I want to offer a few ways to connect deeper with your own journey:

1. Journal Your Turning Point: Think about a time when everything changed for you. What fell apart? What came together? Write it down. Own it.

2. Start a Conversation: Read with a friend, your partner, or a group. Talk about the things we’re taught to keep quiet—identity, faith, grief, and healing. Vulnerability has a way of bringing people together.

3. Create Something: Let this book inspire you to express your own truth—through art, music, poetry, prayer, or whatever speaks to your soul.

4. Revisit Your Faith: Wherever you are spiritually, give yourself permission to question, evolve, and grow. Your relationship with faith is yours. Let it be messy. Let it be real.

❤️ Final Thoughts

Sudden Change is my story, but it’s not mine alone. It’s for anyone who’s ever felt like they didn’t fit in the life they were handed. It’s for those learning to forgive, to speak up, to begin again.

If you’re in a season of transition—if things feel uncertain or undone—I want you to know: you’re not alone.Keep going.Keep trusting.Keep becoming.

This is your reminder that change, no matter how sudden, can lead to something beautiful.

With love and honesty,

Candia J. Oliver